Arwen-Undomiel.com :: View topic - Is this really true?

Another mod threatened me months later saying that if I ever meddled in mod buisness again, they'd ban me and make sure they spread word about what a bad member I was and to ban me from all sites they could reach. That pm came a few weeks ago when I pmed Arwen about it again because this same mod in question was getting at me again

I'm having a bit of doubt about what you have told us Haldy if it is exactly what your friend quoted - if you had copied say the PM's she received then I would, but as you are only typing what she told from the PM's, there is scope there for misinterpretations, which as I said happens. The proof of all this would be to see the PM's and have them sent to another Mod.

I'm sorry that there is this doubt Haldy, from me, but it's hard to believe amongst all these wondeful Moddies there is a one who had such a *bad day* he/she treated another member in this way.

Johnny's Fan wrote:

Omgosh all of you ... this isn't about me!

...

And that's why I think she exaggerated it too because she doesn't have the said PMs to quote to me! Allegedly they were automatically deleted because of the inbox fill so yeah. I never typed anything ... what I quoted is exactly what she said to me. I just copied and pasted.

I don't have the quotes of the PMs to look at so I don't know exactly what happened.

And no worries... I'm in doubt myself as I have already stated for over a million times :]

Author:	Aredhel Ar-Feiniel [ October 15th, 2006, 11:09 pm ]
Post subject:	Is this really true?
Quote: Another mod threatened me months later saying that if I ever meddled in mod buisness again, they'd ban me and make sure they spread word about what a bad member I was and to ban me from all sites they could reach. That pm came a few weeks ago when I pmed Arwen about it again because this same mod in question was getting at me again That's what one of the members here told me ... quoted word-for-word. ... well a part of what she told me. I won't say who.. but is this true??? Is whoever that Mod is really like that? I can't believe it... the member that I talk to never lies and we're really close.. so I was really shocked when she said that to me. Unbelievable. Now I'm seriously angry... with that one Mod that is.. whoever he/she is... and don't ask me which mod either... my friend never told me

Author:	Elanor [ October 15th, 2006, 11:28 pm ]
Post subject:
I can't imagine any of the mods here would say that. If this is on the chat or tag board it's more likely to be someone pretending to be a mod. Ask your friend to forward anything like this to the main moderator's account or to another moddie because Arwen gets loads of PMs.

Author:	Aredhel Ar-Feiniel [ October 15th, 2006, 11:35 pm ]
Post subject:
Yeah I doubt any of the Mods would do that either... nahh she said it was a PM on the forum. Weird. And she said that Arwen was getting mad at her too.. but I don't think that should happen because Arwen doesn't ever lose her temper with members.. and plus, when I have something that I'm angry about and I PM a Mod, they don't usually get ticked off.. they just explain things and reason with me until I understand and it all works out.. none of the Mods are that rude at all so I don't know...

Author:	Arwen the webmaster [ October 16th, 2006, 1:16 am ]
Post subject:
Lol...well, I don't really...respond to PMs...so I don't know how I could have been getting mad at a member, unless it was via telepathy, which, with my sweet admin powers, is entirely possible, but not very probable. Yeah. Whoever told you that seems to have "issues"...

Author:	Aredhel Ar-Feiniel [ October 16th, 2006, 7:00 am ]
Post subject:
Like I said.. I can't imagine you - Arwen - acting like that. It's just.. not very believable.

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Is this really true? http://www.arwen-undomiel.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=30&t=11742	Page 1 of 1

Author:	tindomerel [ October 16th, 2006, 4:49 pm ]
Post subject:
wow..blinks, re-reads and blinks again...Just to reiterate what's already been said...I really cannot imagine a mod doing that, I don't know any mods here with that kind of seriously vindictive, angry attitude. I mean sure we all have bad days, but that would be Totally and completely crossing a line to harrass a member let alone threaten them, no other mods would accept that attitude nor would Arwen. Also, all the mods I've gotten to know, and Arwen, are all sweet, tenderhearted people... yeah they enforce the rules, but it's not a power hungry sort of thing, it's just a duty to keep this site safe and friendly. However, Haldir, I am not calling your friend a liar, but rather, I do wonder if something was taken out of context or maybe misinterpreted? You know how emails and pm's can be, one can not tell the tone of the other person and has to assume it for themselves. Just an idea. I do hate to think that someone would spread lies about a member or a mod, so I do hope this is resolved between those actually involved.

Author:	Gwenneth [ October 16th, 2006, 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:
When something like this happens, I think it's smarter to go to another mod/the mod account. Telling your friend won't help sort things out. Though it's doubtful that the entire story is true, this member and mod would be feeling very awkward right about now. Gossiping to your friend about another member [yes, mods are members, too] won't solve the problem. Either confront that person about it, or go to someone else in a poweful position who can do something about it.

Author:	Johnny's Fan [ October 16th, 2006, 5:58 pm ]
Post subject:
Whoa, I think people should take a deep breath not too deep or you'll collapse and calm down a little. I don't think anyone is calling anybody a liar but there does seem to be a huge misunderstanding going on, as is with the case of talking via PM's and stuff. I know myself, that when an incident upset me and I PM'd someone and actually talked about it, I've looked back and thought "I didn't express that very well" as the person I PM'd misunderstood something I said. Especially, if your angry and upset, words just tumble out, and sometimes you can exaggerate incindents. Obviously something has happened between a Mod and a member, and both parties may well have over-reacted and meanings got mixed up etc, otherwise this wouldn't have been brought up. I'm having a bit of doubt about what you have told us Haldy if it is exactly what your friend quoted - if you had copied say the PM's she received then I would, but as you are only typing what she told from the PM's, there is scope there for misinterpretations, which as I said happens. The proof of all this would be to see the PM's and have them sent to another Mod. I'm sorry that there is this doubt Haldy, from me, but it's hard to believe amongst all these wondeful Moddies there is a one who had such a bad day he/she treated another member in this way. Hopefully this will all be settled without any unpleasantness and your friend will come back.

Author:	Johnny's Fan [ October 16th, 2006, 6:30 pm ]
Post subject:
Haldir o Lórien wrote: Johnny's Fan wrote: I'm having a bit of doubt about what you have told us Haldy if it is exactly what your friend quoted - if you had copied say the PM's she received then I would, but as you are only typing what she told from the PM's, there is scope there for misinterpretations, which as I said happens. The proof of all this would be to see the PM's and have them sent to another Mod. I'm sorry that there is this doubt Haldy, from me, but it's hard to believe amongst all these wondeful Moddies there is a one who had such a bad day he/she treated another member in this way. Omgosh all of you ... this isn't about me! ... And that's why I think she exaggerated it too because she doesn't have the said PMs to quote to me! Allegedly they were automatically deleted because of the inbox fill so yeah. I never typed anything ... what I quoted is exactly what she said to me. I just copied and pasted. I don't have the quotes of the PMs to look at so I don't know exactly what happened. And no worries... I'm in doubt myself as I have already stated for over a million times :] Ah, I get it now and I apologise for the misunderstanding. I didn't realise that what you posted were the actual conversations. It just looked liked to me (and to other people I'm sure) that what we were reading was what you were telling us from memory or..whatever.

Author:	Ivreniel [ October 16th, 2006, 7:38 pm ]
Post subject:
We have rules for moderating, too, HoL. Think of it this way, there are ways we are allowed to mod and ways we are not allowed to mod, just as they are ways all of y'all are allowed to post and ways y'all aren't allowed to post. We are not supposed to get upset---in fact, we have this unspoken but definately in place system that if one mod feels upset, they'll pass the "case" on to another mod. In fact, your official warnings leading up to a suspension or a ban will come via the mod account, not from a specific mod. That's our way---that's actually pretty official. We are only supposed to ban for rule-breaking. Usually you'll get several strikes. You shouldn't get a strike unless you've (a) been warned without "repenting" (b) done something pretty bad. Three strikes means a one-week suspension. Again, your suspension alert will have been posted in the mod forum and sent through the A-U Moderators account. Never through an individual. If you've done something really bad (like we've occasionally gotton a person posting beep) yeah, you'll be banned right away... If you've gotten a strike, you'll be warned how many strikes are left. If you've been suspended a couple times, and you persist in rule-breaking, yeah, we'll ban. But I can count on one hand those who have gone through this system of strikes and been banned. Yep. One hand. I think Tin, Arwen, and Ela have covered the other points.

Author:	Kitoky [ October 16th, 2006, 9:09 pm ]
Post subject:
I'd like to note that many times, things are interpreted a bit too much between the lines, one person saying this could mean another thing to the other person --- and we get offended, or we assume things a lot --- though I doubt a mod would threaten or be severe, there are times when we say things through thin lips and it may sound very severe when we don't mean to be. It all could be a misunderstanding.

Author:	Elanor [ October 16th, 2006, 9:26 pm ]
Post subject:
Seeing as we don't know which moderator it was that said this or exactly what they said I don't really see the point in discussing this any further so I'm locking the thread. If any of you have a problem with what a moderator has said or done to you then either PM another moderator who you trust or the general moderator account with the full details, including if possible quoting exactly what they have said. If that appears to get no response or an unfair one then you could post in this section. However, that should only be done as a last resort.

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