Awesome!
Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.
Barium: What we do to most people when they die.
Benign: What you be after you be eight.
Bernadette: The act of torching a mortgage.
Burglarize: What a crook sees with.
Coffee: A person who is coughed upon.
Control: A short, ugly inmate.
Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.
Eyedropper: A clumsy ophthalmologist.
Flatulence: Emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
Heroes: What a guy in a boat does.
Left Bank: What the robber did when his bag was full of loot.
Normalize: 20-20 vision.
Oily: The opposite of late.
Relief: What trees do in the spring.
Selfish: What the owner of a seafood store does.
Subdued: Like, a guy, who like, works on one of those, like, submarines.
Yawn: An honest opinion, openly expressed.
These are the ones I thought were the best; if you've got time, you can visit
http://www.dribbleglass.com/Jokes/definitions.htm - they have quite a few.
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Mae govannen, mellon nin. Coramin linduae elle le!

^Thanks to Elenriel of Mirkwood! c: