A little while ago I was taken by the muse again (the sneaky little chap likes to creep up on me when I'm not looking and make me write stuff), and also by a fit of patriotism. Or more accurately, a fit of annoyance about the way this country is/what it's become, tempered by the fact I love so many bits of it and the fact that in many ways it is still so great.
Anyway, rambly explanation over, here is what I produced. It's still a work in progress, but I've decided to share it with you guys.


My England


This is my England

My England is a land of green and gold and brown,
Of bright sunshine, grey cloud and crisp frost.

My England is hedgerows and cornfields and wildflowers,
is the oak woods, rolling hills and rocky coasts.

My England is drystone wall and thatched cottage and village church,
is the terraced railway cottage, isolated farmstead, and market town.

My England is the chalk downs, the wide vales and the granite uplands,
the Lakes and Peaks, the rolling countryside of Middle England, the Cornish coastline.

My England is clear rills and brooks and streams, the great ponderous rivers.
Is the winding country lane, the pony and trap, and the ancient stone bridge

My England is proud and noble and elegant
My England is strong and kind and honourable
My England is intelligent and gracious and historic.

This is my England.
My England is beautiful.



As ever, constructive criticism is welcomed

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^Many Thanks to Pandora for this fantastic banner

I Melain berio le

[+@*$%=#_?&:;]

Joined 31st Oct 2005, contrary to what it says over there <--- and am thus missing 2500+ posts

Ah, it's been far too long a time since I got to read your lovely poetry.

This really does makes me think of home, and all the things I love and miss about it...

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"Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination" - Oscar Wilde

Truth be told, I'm almost completely dissatisfied with this peice of writing. It doesn't flow properly, and I'm not sure it adequately describes or represents what I intended. The lack of flow is my main problem, especially since most of my previous work flows easily from one line or peice of imagery to the next. But I really don't know how to fix it.

_________________

^Many Thanks to Pandora for this fantastic banner

I Melain berio le

[+@*$%=#_?&:;]

Joined 31st Oct 2005, contrary to what it says over there <--- and am thus missing 2500+ posts

Ah, I still like it.
This may sound bizarre, but I think the number of "and"s are what breaks the flow in some cases. Potentially, roughly even out the syllables in each stanza, see if that helps at all?

Play around with it, because I think this one is definitely worth salvaging.

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"Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination" - Oscar Wilde