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Post subject: I'm Sorry Posted: February 7th, 2008, 11:14 pm |
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Joined: 07 June 2005 Posts: 5272 Location: Texas
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I'm sorry,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry forever.
I'm sorry I forgot
The first thing we shared.
I'm sorry I destroyed
What we once had.
It's all my fault,
Please blame me!
You don't have
To come back,
Just hear what I say.
I'm sorry I asked
Something I shouldn't have asked.
I'm sorry I thought
You'd understand my words.
I'm even sorry
Our ways had to cross.
The one thing I ask now,
The one last thing...
Is for you to forgive me,
To know that I'm sorry.
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Post subject: Posted: February 15th, 2008, 12:55 pm |
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Joined: 07 June 2005 Posts: 1629 Location: Middle-earth
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To me, this doesn't quite seem like a poem - just a letter of apology or something along those lines. It doesn't have any extra flourish that really makes it poetic. I'd like to see some metaphors or similies or some rhyme to really boost it up a notch. The sentiment is there though. It's a nice sentiment too.
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