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Post subject: Alone. (a short Poem) Posted: January 27th, 2006, 3:00 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Alone
When all around you care so much,
And life goes on each day.
But those around can't calm your mind,
And you slowly drift away.
What then can I do alone,
To keep them close to me?
While still trying to heal my hurt,
And be what I ought to be?
When each night brings sorrows hiden,
From all there eyes to see.
At tears flow down out of sight,
That no sees but God and me.
Sometimes to talk to somone close,
would bring my night to day.
But all I have is devinity,
To here each time I pray.
Granted He is there for me,
Without him I am dead.
But I need somone that I can see,
as well, not instead.
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Post subject: Posted: January 28th, 2006, 2:21 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005 Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Wow, that is a really beautiful poem, Jax Nova. I really like it.
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: January 28th, 2006, 5:28 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Thanks. Appriciate the complements. If anyone out there has any advice to help me improve please feel free to give it out!!
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Post subject: Posted: January 30th, 2006, 8:52 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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i really like that. that's a really good poem.
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: January 31st, 2006, 12:13 pm |
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Joined: 20 January 2006 Posts: 1429 Location: Hertfordshire, England
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I really like it as well, Jax.
You should write poetry more often, it's gorgeous!
_________________ "Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination" - Oscar Wilde
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Post subject: Posted: January 31st, 2006, 8:58 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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ya, seriously. i luv poetry, & ur is REALLY good!! this is my favorite:
When each night brings sorrows hiden,
From all there eyes to see.
At tears flow down out of sight,
That no sees but God and me.
Sometimes to talk to somone close,
would bring my night to day.
But all I have is devinity,
To here each time I pray.
Granted He is there for me,
Without him I am dead.
But I need somone that I can see,
as well, not instead.
i luv poetry. i could NEVER wirte it lol, but i luv 2 read it.
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: January 31st, 2006, 9:11 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005 Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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^ Yes, I'm the same way. I love reading it, but I'm no good at writting it!! Jax, you're going to have to write poetry more often to satisfy the rest of us, since you're so good at it. 
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: February 1st, 2006, 3:09 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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lol. Well I love to write it so I don't gota problem with that. I'm glad you like it! And I think you could write poetry if you realy practiced enough.. you should see... well shouldn't see... some of the stuff I wrote when I first started... it was horible. lol
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Post subject: Posted: February 2nd, 2006, 8:27 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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no, u dont wanna see my poems. lol mine r like:
this is matt
he is a cat
he sat on a hat
then ate a rat
lol. seriously they suck. but I LOVE to read poems!!! (if they rn't my crappy 1's, of course.  ) i luv the 1's in the LotR books & luv this 1 u wrote!!!
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: February 2nd, 2006, 9:14 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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lol. Well that's what mine were like when I first started. Just keep writing and you will get better.
Glad you like it though.
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Post subject: Posted: February 3rd, 2006, 6:46 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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ya.....i dont think poetry's 4 me. lol u keep writing 'em, & i'll keep reading 'em & wishing i could write 'em, k? lol 
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: February 3rd, 2006, 6:52 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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lol well... If you injoy it I don't think it matters whether you are good at it or not.
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Post subject: Posted: February 3rd, 2006, 6:57 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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i'll stick w/ music.  i dont really like writing it, but i do luv reading it, so lt me know when u've got a new 1!! 
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: February 3rd, 2006, 7:05 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Well there is one down there somewhere called "Freedom's Cry."
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Post subject: Posted: February 20th, 2006, 12:02 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006 Posts: 3132 Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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I luv this poem so much, I went back through all of the poems & read this one again!!!  I luv all of your writing, but this is definately my favorite. I guess it's because I can relate to it. I totally understand wut you mean & I feel the same way. I luv the last stanza. (sp?)
Granted He is there for me,
Without him I am dead.
But I need somone that I can see,
as well, not instead.
as well, not instead.....that's so cool!!  I luv poems that when u read it, u say "that's exactly how I was feeling, I just didn't know how to put it into words." & this poem did that for me. keep up the good work!!
_________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: February 20th, 2006, 4:19 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005 Posts: 19521 Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Thanks. I honestly feel kind of sorry for you if that's the way you feel... I know what it's like. lol.
But I have found after talking to a few people that part of my trouble was I was thinking to much inwardly... so it's got better now. Granted the pain will never go away completely....
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