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Post subject: A poem  Posted: March 5th, 2006, 2:44 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005
Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Ok, this is my first time writing poetry, and I did this hastily during math class a couple days ago... I'd appriciate any advice you guys have!! You'll all probably notice the lines from LotR that snuck in there inevitablely, lol.
I'm so lost
I'm so, so alone
Ane hopelessness fills me
right down to the bone
No one to listen
no one to confide
I'm on a Lonely Isle
with a surrounding high tide
The sea will soon sweep me away
to lands unknown
To lands far away
where the sun has not shone
The Shadow is upon me
the end has come
Tears flood my eyes
my heart is numb
I walk a lonely road
I'm so far from home
But look! A star shines
in the evening sky
A small beam of hope
that cannot die
There is beauty up there
that no shadow can touch
It will go on
though it's not much
A hope to us all
when darkness covers day
If we believe
we will find our way
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: March 6th, 2006, 7:16 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Very nice!  Gave good imagery and rymed nicely.
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Post subject: Posted: March 6th, 2006, 8:10 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005
Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Thanks!!
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: March 7th, 2006, 2:50 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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will you be posting more?
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Post subject: Posted: March 7th, 2006, 8:04 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005
Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Well... we'll see. I'm not sure.  Maybe though.
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: March 7th, 2006, 9:16 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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ok. Will be watching. Just PM me if I don't reply I might miss it. lol. But if you like writing I say keep it up! You got talent and if you injoy it... well why not do it.
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Post subject: Posted: March 7th, 2006, 9:30 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005
Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Thank you- and I'll let you know.
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: March 8th, 2006, 2:46 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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ok.
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 6:08 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006
Posts: 3132
Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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*agrees w/ everything jax said* 
*is jealous* lol _________________ 
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 6:47 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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lol. You should post some of yours if you have any. Maybe somone out there can give you some advice to help you. I honestly would know nothing to say to you besides try to rym and keep the sylables constant to a degree... but I really don't know much about the technical stuff.. (and let it flow)
By the way Arwenevenstar, I like the way you portray hope in the end of the poem.
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 6:51 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006
Posts: 3132
Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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no, but thanks anyway. _________________
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 6:58 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 7:07 pm |
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Joined: 08 January 2006
Posts: 3132
Location: The Shire
Gender: Female
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lol. trust me, not my thing.
_________________
"Great art is as irrational as great music. It is mad with its own loveliness."
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Post subject: Posted: March 9th, 2006, 7:18 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Ok. I guess we all have things like that.
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Post subject: Posted: March 12th, 2006, 2:50 pm |
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Joined: 30 December 2005
Posts: 2901
Gender: Female
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Thanks, both of you!! I might post some more up in awhile... but I've been sooooooo busy lately with all of my school stuff- we had end of the trimester finals this week. I'll try to write more when I have time. Thanks again!!
_________________
"Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
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Post subject: Posted: March 13th, 2006, 7:09 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Ok! will wait. Although If I miss it feel free to PM me about it I tend to be unobservant at times.
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