Mrs. Haldir, it is never too late to get help. I for one care if you kill yourself or not, and I'm sure so many people on A-U will agree.

If you are feeling suicidal, have a look at http://www.areason.org. This site has saved my life many a time.


My depression had been getting less after I had a course of counselling, but then I went away for a few weeks and I'm back at square 1 again. I keep on thinking of hurting myself, and I have such low feelings of self worth that even some of my closest friends are turning away from me. I confided in one of my best friends about everything, and it turns out that she couldn't cope with all of my feelings and now she's been crying over it and going to the people in her church for help as she doesn't know how to cope or how to deal with it. I wish that I had never talked to her about it because though it helped me it really shocked and scared her and I never wanted to do that to her.

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My depression comes and goes. I dare not seek any counselling. I've been through enough of it in my life and none had ever helped and I will not waste my time and money for something that doesn't help. I do not really know why it comes and goes, something triggers it, I cannot really say what. I really do not have any to talk to when I am like this. I don't trust speaking to my mom cause she only really thinks that she had failed somewhere. As for the whole hurting myself, it's a normal thing for me. I cut and it's become something that I do alot not just to only punish myself, but I like the feeling of it.

Hmm...I read the site but I think I would have to read it a couple more times before all that information can sink into my head.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

My counselling was free, I got it on the computer, because my parents can't afford to pay for counselling. They seem to think that I'm just making a big deal out of nothing.

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Hmm... this club has been silent...

Well, maybe you haven't noticed, but I haven't been online too often lately... guess why? and why I post this in 'Club for the Depressed'?
Easy answer... I was seriously depressed, completely down actually, something happened in my life that I guess I'll never be able to forget... I'm still shocked thinking of it, it makes me feel like faint...
I hope I'm through this now that I stop crying myself to bed and I'll try to get online more often again... not sure I'll be able to do this, but I'll try.

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I'm always here if you want to talk over pm Erana

I think I'm dragging myself through my depression, I only have a really bad day about twice a week now

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Really? Counselling over the computer? Never heard of such a thing. Geez, you can do almost anything online these days.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

Pretty much

I've been talking to one of my friends with depression, she got better, and now she's helping me

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My stupid mother keeps asking me to hand over a little bit of my rolled money which is somewhat part of my life savings, while on the other hand, I have been trying really hard to save up that rolled money for something which I will never get a chance at because I am now at a point where I will end up giving up every penny I have to my name just to keep a roof over our heads and we are already struggling to make ends as it is. At this rate, I have kissed all my hopes and dreams goodbye, I hate my life.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

Awww, I would give you some money if I could. I don't have a LOT but I do have quite a stash, seeing as I rarely spend it. I usually end up giving it away in a moment of generosity.

I hate my life, too, but I usually decide I like it if I think long enough about how bad things COULD be. But I'm still kind of depressed:

1. Everyone likes my younger sister more than me

2. I had to get a wart scraped off my face

3.I was told to keep it dry on the very day a girl I'm trying to keep a friendship with invited us to swim (I went swimming, but it hurt)

4. I don't fit in anywhere because I'm too different

5. My orthodontist is inexperienced and sometimes makes mistakes with my braces at my expense

6. A creepy guy likes me but nobody else does

7. At my church we sing songs that I would blush to worship to because they are so...so...(I don't know what you came to do, but I came to praise the Lord )

8. I haven't seen the third ee of the lotr trilogy!!!

I won't bore you all with the rest of my list.

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~Follower of Christ~

~Extreme Evanescent~

~Claimed Elladan July 03, 2007~ :3

That is my stash she is taking from me. Trust me, next it will be my savings account in the bank. Your list isn't boring, trust me. I could make a much longer one.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

Mrs. Haldir, to you! What did you want a chance at that you won't be able to now? I really wish I could help you out!

Miriel, your list isn't boring Post the rest of it, if it'll make you feel better.

~

My parents think that I'm being moody all the time and have conversation about how rude I am and what they're going to do with me when they know perfectly well I'm in earshot, my mum says that she ought to sell me to some other family and even though I know she can't do that it still really hurts when she says it. She says I'm a spoilt selfish brat.

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I'll post mine too if you want. I actually came up with over 30.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

Post it if you want to

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I didn't post my biggest problems simply for privacy reasons, but I'll bet I could come up with some more!!

Oops, is that smiley not allowed in here? (JK)

I simply can't forget the misunderstandings that happened between my dad and me over the years, my feelings were hurt and they never got cleared up, I just cried myself to sleep or something. I know I shouldn't hang on to the past, but whenever I remember something I have to fight the tears AGAIN!! It's true, I have a bitterness problem...

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~Follower of Christ~

~Extreme Evanescent~

~Claimed Elladan July 03, 2007~ :3

Alright then, a fair warning...most are not pretty and a few may be dark. And do pardon my language.

1. I was never suppose to be born. But I am here and I think that is a mistake.
2. I have to be reminded that I look like my father whom I hate with every bit of my heart and soul.
3. I swear I think my mother hates me. And I hate her. She always yells at me.
4. I am too b*****, arrogant and aloof for my own good and my family hates it.
5. I hate my life and I hate myself.
6. I swear I think one of my foster mothers tried to drown me.
7. I no longer believe there is a god.
8. If there was a god, he would not let someone live so miserably to the point where they wish they could just die.
9. I have no life in the real world.
10. I hate the real world.
11. I live in a fantasy world just to escape from the real world.
12. I am Emo and my family hates it.
13. I do not care what they think.
14. We have to struggle to make ends meet and I have to give up things for it.
15. I’ve kissed all my hopes and dreams goodbye.
16. You need money to live your dreams.
17. My mother gets on my back about what am I going to do with my life.
18. Well, gee, I do not know. You are taking my money and you need money to start a life for yourself and at this rate…nothing, I will be doing nothing with my life.
19. No one ever supported my hopes and dreams and without support, you cannot really get anywhere.
20. I will most likely never be able to afford to get married or have kids, there for, I will not marry or have kids.
21. I am not even really interested in marriage or kids.
22. It will save me thousands and thousand of dollars in the long run so I can just live.
23. I am not woman a man wants anyway.
24. Nor am I parent material.
25. I hate the fact that I have to live with Hypoglycemia and the possibility of having it become Diabetes later on in life.
26. It seems to piss my mother off because I have to live with it.
27. I tend to drink when I am really upset. I know is solves no problems but I really do not care sometimes. And too much drinking is bad for my Hypoglycemia.
28. I’ve tried to be nice but every just takes advantage of my kindness. That is why I’ve stopped being nice to most.
29. I have been told that I am worthless, ****ed up and that no one wants me around.
30. A-U is about the only place that I feel at home. And that’s a pretty sad fact.
31. Sometimes I wish I could just die and start over. Or at least go back in time and fix everything that went wrong. If it were possible, I am sure I’d be living a much better life.
32. I feel like I am lost in the darkness and there’s no way out.

_________________
And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥