I know very well suicide isn't the answer but honestly, I don't give a rat's *beep*.
And Haldir, you're one of the only people I know that actually has a future and has plans for their lives. At times I envy you but I would never take to such a level where it would just piss me off. I know you worked hard to get where you are and that your family has good expectations. My family doesn't have any expectations at all. No one nd I mean litterly, dispite how big my family is on my mom's side is, no one has ever succeeded in anything in life, ever. Only my eldest cousin has. The rest of just live below average lives and all the time, we wonder what bill we will be able to pay this month. We all struggle to live and struggle to find work.
My mom had my future planned out for me when I was fairly little. She planned to send me to art school. When I was very little, I was very skilled in drawing, good enough that she actually sent a lot of my work to Disney and straight from them, they told her that they wanted me to work them but I was too young at the time. I think I had to at least 13 but I was only 7. But did it happen? No. And it was all my dad's fault and my aunt's fault. I was just 9 for Eru's sake. My dad nearly put us on the street and my aunt just ruined my life. I had a future, and it was ruined. If things worked out they way thy should have, I would have been living a great life but instead, I'm living a poor life and wishing that I was dead. Beisdes, I no londer have that drawing skill like I did as a child, I don't even like drawing anymore.
I never tried my hardest in high school cause I knew full well I had no future and no money for college. I didn't have my family there through out my high school life so the only thing I really thought I had to do was get my diploma. No one ever was there to help me and I had to work on everything on my own but I never got anywhere. I had my own dreams but no one ever supported me. All people did was cock eyebrows, question my reasoning, or laugh. I only had very few supporters and that was only some school mates. My only family didn't even support my choices. So therefore, I have given up on my dreams and now believe I will just live my life struggling to live. Which will not be long since I will not allow myself to grow old. I will just let myself hit a certain age then deicde I've had enough. Plus, I'v finally realized that I'd never be able to live my dream. I can act the part right sure but I don't have the attitude or the look for it. I'm too ugly, plus I'm just too short-tempered and arrogant for my own good.


Rough patch? That doesn't even cover it, not all at. And I have been facing it, more then half of my life and nothing has ever changed. I've only gotten more miserable as the years went on.



Trust me, it's not just simple 'just picking on each other.' Too much yelling screaming for just picking on people. At times I think a fist fight will break out. I tell them to leave me alone all the time but they don't listen. They always come back and act like nothing has happened even though my face and attitude say different yet they're just too stupid and figure it out.



I don't have any friends. Well, at least none IRL anyway. I actually dislike being around people physically. And my family is just one of the reasons why I'm miserable. My mom doesn't have a clue about anything and my younger sister thinks she's all that and believes the world evloves around her and can get what she wants now.

Now pardon me while I leave this thread and have some crying time.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

My family haven't really achieved anything either. Unfortunately, I was born with brains unlike the rest of my family so they all expect me to achieve so much. Sometimes, that's worse than your family having no expectations, because I constantly have to work to achieve what they want me to achieve, and if I don't they get angry.



Oh, that's such a shame Sounds like you had an amazing talent but it all got thrown away



You're not ugly! Short-tempered-ness and arrogance are traits that many people have, it doesn't mean that you won't be able to live your dream! It's not going to come round by itself, you'll have to work for it, but it'll be worth it. I believe in you, you can make your dream happen one day



Try and see a doctor, get some professional help. It's so hard trying to pull through this by yourself, it really honestly helps to see a doctor or someone like that.



My mum and my sister are like that. They both shout at me all the time and my sister gets away with it, whereas if I even raise my voice at her I get shouted at more. I'm just trying to prove them wrong, that I'm not worthless, that I do have a dream and I will work through it.

I'm not sure if I've shown you this before, but these forums - http://www.teen-moods.net/forums are really great, everyone on there is so supportive and they all have similar problems so they give the best advice

Please don't give up, we all believe in you here and you're not alone

(Sorry if this was no help)

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Come on now, grip yourself, you can make something of yourself, it doesn't matter if no one in your family hasn't made anything of themselves, i know you can, Death is scary (having several death experiances). I know life can get hard at times, but really is it that bad. You can still find a talent, but until then, get out there find a part time job, so that when you find what your good at, you can pay to make that talent into a profession, you look quite good at graphics, so why not web-design!

Remember, not everybodys the same, i'm sure you can get a good profession, if you believe in yourself!

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That really is sad. But don't ever think that you're alone, because you're not. There are people with similar problems out there, and a lot of those people are completely --- right now. You know why they're that way? Because they let it get to them. Does your family understand you? No. Do they matter to you? No. Do you love them? You said it yourself. No. Then you can't let them get to you. When they *beep* at you, just ignore them and think "Pssh whatever. You don't know me." Because if you don't and you let their words get to you, you will never get better. It will be impossible.


I understand the feeling of when you feel like you're fading away. It's like you're just watching life around you and you don't do anything yourself. All you do is what you have to do. You have no inspiration, you don't like anything. Sometimes you just want to curl up and go to some dark place and fade from people's memories and fade from everything. But if you want that feeling to go away and not waste life, you have to find a purpose for life. That's all you really have to do. Slowly things will come back to you.


Here is what I think about suicide... It's pointless. I'm sorry if this offends anyone that's reading this that's religious or some such thing, but... No one has died and come back to tell the tale. No one knows for sure what happens after death. That might not be what your belief is, but you have to admit that nothing can be proven about the afterlife. Life after death may be one hundred times better or one hundred times worse. Maybe when you die, your so called spirit doesn't die and you're conscious of being burned/buried "alive". Maybe nothing happens at all... You just disappear into oblivion. Can you even grasp the idea of oblivion? I know I can't. You just CEASE to exist. You can't even acknowledge the relief. You can't feel the weight being lifted off of your shoulders. You just... poof. Committing suicide will ease your pain, right, because you can't feel pain when you're dead (everyone says this but they don't even know if that's true)? Well then what's the point? You won't feel the relief. It will end life and nothing will come out of it. It would've been pointless. That's why I know I just want to do whatever I enjoy my whole life and screw everything else. No one knows ANYTHING about life itself. What's the point? What happens when you die? Why is there anything in existence in the first place?


And do you want to end up like them? Or do you want to be different? Don't think about what your family has done and then assume that is what your future will be. You have to be open minded. Think of a purpose, no matter how much it is laughed at. Why would you care if people laugh or think it's retarded? This is your life and you can live it how you want it. They will never fully understand you and that's why it shouldn't matter. Just follow your instincts and go with the flow. Life is much easier once you find a purpose or a goal. Really.

The only reason you find nothing interesting, including drawing, is because you have no inspiration, and that is not surprising. You need to find who you are. You need to find yourself, find what you want to do, and it will all come back to you. Who knows, maybe you will find drawing a good outlet. You might not be as good as you once were, but you obviously had good artistic abilities when you were little. You can get it back. Don't let your family destroy your life. Why would you surrender to them? If you want to, vow to yourself to be better than them and then laugh at them afterwards.

There is nothing wrong with struggling to live. And how do you know that you will never live your dreams? Are you psychic now? The only reason you won't live your dreams on the track you're on is because you haven't even figured out what you truly want to do or who you truly want to be or who you truly are. You're "fading away". Of course you won't live your dreams that way. But if you really wanted to, you can fix that. Be the different one in your family. *beep* them, focus on what YOU want. And who cares if you're ugly or arrogant? This is your time to live, you don't live to please others. You live to do what you enjoy to do because this is the only time we'll have this life.

If you pull through, what you hate about your life now is only going to make you stronger in the future.


This tells me that you focus on your pain a lot more then getting better. You focus on the past, not the future. If you live in the past, you will never move forward. If you keep waiting for tomorrow, all you'll have is a thousand burned out yesterdays. You have to do something right now to change your life for the better. Don't focus on the pain, unless that's what you want to live in for the rest of your life.


Well then, that gives you a reason to ignore both your mom and your sister when they yell at you, doesn't it? It gives you a reason to not care what they think. They don't understand you, so don't listen to their judgments, because they are based on what they know about you.

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Keyo, you give great advice

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I would love to die, but not commit suicide, i think i would find some peace at last!

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^Hear hear!

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Someone help me, today i woke up feeling very angry and at the sane time hurt n depressed, i also had the notshion of self harming myself....and this is totaly unlike me!

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^Well do you know why you felt like that? Or was it just a random mood you felt when you got up?


I wanted to ask for some advice for a friend... He's an artist and all, but lately he's been feeling really crappy about his drawings. He looks at everyone else's work in his class and thinks they're better than his and that he screwed up his beyond repair. He says he has inspiration, but anything he draws turns out like crap.

I think it's because he's depressed... I mean, his mom isn't too great. He's the atheist in a christian family, artist in an anti-artist family, etc. She's always telling him he's the reason for almost all of her stress, he's wasting his time with art, etc. One time she actually told him that she wished she could kill him. =/

So I was wondering what I could say that could help him feel better about his art... Because I think that's a major portion of what's bothering him right now.

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I give up. I can't take it anymore. My depression and everything else that goes with it is back again.

_________________
And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

^Hm hm. Looks like that is something you'll just have to suck up and accept hunh? x]

I would give advice--but why the heck waste my time when no one ever listens (or at least you wont) ?

Yeah, yeah. Sounded mean. But thats the truth.

Haldir--you dont listen to anyone's advice. thats your problem. you dont want to get over your depression. you're not trying hard enough.

Thats the cold truth. and while you're reading this, this is making you even more depressed, I know.

Thats all. Hate me, kill me, whatever...You've gotten alot of awesome advice from these fellow AUers.

Seems to me, yeah, you dont wanna get over your depression at all. You dont wanna try not even for 1 milisecond.

Crimson Sand... that's enough, okay? If you don't want to give her advice, then don't. There is no need to ridicule her out in the open. You know it's not helping, so why post it? You don't even understand her situation, so honestly... shut up.

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Crimson, I already hate you. You're not just a snot who thinks she's better than everyone else. Here's one reason why I cannot open well and take advice from others because there is always one person who has to judge everything and ruin it and honestly, I am not the only one who thinks so. And don't act like you know me because you don't nor can you count the many years. You may not think that I try hard but you listen here, I do try hard, more then you will ever know. So for the record, keep your mouth shut since you obviously have nothing nice to say about anything or anyone.

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And as he looked into her eyes
Within the auburn of her hair
The trembling starlight of the skies
He saw there mirrored bright and fair

♥In a poly relationship with Kili and Tauriel♥

Whoa! Wait a minute guys! Let's back up! This is not a thread for bashing one another or flaming . Which by the way, is against the rules! I've had a few issues with this thread and the disregarding of the rules, if this continues, we may have to lock it for good, so I suggest you guys to stop calling each other "stupid" or "lost causes" because it's against the rules. Instead lets start helping and supporting each other through their rough times instead of the insults! Kapeesh? Comprendre? Verstehen? Capire?


And as the old saying goes " If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all"

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Saying nice things...is that all you want to hear? You do not want to hear the truth.

I've seen people who pretend to be depressed for attention. they come back to their thread after a few weeks and post, "Its all hopeless" countless advice is given, but its mute to their ears. Im not saying that YOU are like this, Mrs. Haldir.

Hate me, kill me. I do not care. I know Im not the voice of reason, but I did not intend to flame up there. I wasnt flaming, let me clear that up.

Why do I never give advice? Stuff like this happens. I make more people hurt me.

Honestly, right now, I feel horrible for making both of (or all of you on this thread) hate me. I know what I said was harsh, but I just had to say that, because that is how I felt when I read all of the great advice, and you did not even give a "thank for you caring"

When I hurt others, I feel like I should harm myself in any way possible. Not because Im feeling sorry for myself, but because I feel sorry for the ones I hurt. and hurting myself twice as hard in return, eases me.

Now...Ill leave. Cause you all still hate me, I know, Thats life. Life isnt a basket of sweetness and kind words, you've gotta get used to dealing with things like what I've said above.

Oh yes...I've learned to deal with it. Because I've gotten stuff like that thrown at my face in real life, and online. But Im not trying to turn this situation around my problems. So, ignore that.

As far as anyone cares, I dont matter anymore in this life at least.

I said to myself "Im going to try and help people from now on who are alone and depressed" but Im not doing a good job.

Btw, that saying " If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all" I totally disagree with it. It comes right in some situations, but not ALL OF THE TIME.

You gotta be harsh sometimes.

It. Is. Life.

Now, goodbye. Forever from this forum.

According to the rules though, harsh isn't acceptable to one another on the forum... you should have read them before joining

And goodbye.

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